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funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit

funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit

Every time that we’re getting grilled, “I gotta take a shit” comes ringing in from the back of the formation. I saw a Master Sergeant from San Diego reduced to silence after one answer. The drill Sergeant would say "The CO likes to chew a lot of ass but I've got more ass than he's got teeth". Oh boy, do I. Which is usually some Junior Officer puke that got assigned that job, but we didn’t know any better. Topic: Quote From My Drill Sergeant This is a quote from one of my drill sergeants that I sort of adopted on occasion when someone threatened to go "over my head". Son here, actually. Finally, we have one guy who is still on there after two weeks and the DI tells him to go to the doctor. You’re fucking dead. This is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard. and kept walking. Hartman in “Full Metal Jacket” as we honor R. Lee Ermey on his 72nd birthday. He dropped out of view from the window laughing, came back up and yelled " It was never cancelled because IM STILL HERE!" ?” “Wabbaubaubababu!” “DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO FUCK OFF! I was going through Air Force basic training and when on guard duty if an unauthorized person wanted to be let in to the bunks you had to report it to your drill sergeant. Jen Lancaster. See more ideas about military humor, military quotes, military memes. I'd love to hear some funny military stories, basic stories, drill instructor quotes etc. Explore. Marine Quotes Marine Corps Drill Instructor Quotes Funny Drill Sergeant Quotes Funny Boot Camp Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes John F. Kennedy Quotes The DI made every recruit look at it and we played played taps for it as we flushed it down the toilet. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Our new RI is a drill sergeant. This massive and terrifying giant of an E6 who later became one of my favorite NCOs stopped dead in front of me, looked me in the eyes and screamed "PRIVATE! “Now stomp on it and scream ‘die, smile die!’ As loud as you can!” The female trainee stood there for a second before following through. Now, the hilarity of ASMDSS is available in book form. Any funny drill instructor/sergeant quotes or boot camp military stories? Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Apr 3, 2019 - 5 Tumblr Users Share Stories Of Their Worldly Knowledge All Thanks To The Arts - We share because we care. But what a fabulous lesson we had last night! said ‘I could have sworn I made my bed’—drill sergeant was behind me. ", "Private, are you allowed within 50 yards of a school? email. BrainyQuote has been providing inspirational quotes since 2001 to our worldwide community. The basic training soldier replied “go around, drill sergeant, I'm waitin' on an omelette”. THE MOTH GOES AND GETS THE FUCKING EAGLE YOU STUPID FUCK.". This article is a transcript of all of the quotes from a given character or entity. That’s not even the best insult I got from my Drill Sergeants. ?” “WABBABUBUBABABBAU!! The boot camp humor and basic training stories shared by veterans on Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said has had us in stitches for years. So I can shoot you in the fucking face.”, Or the one DS who would sneak up on people and just whisper “Boom. The TI continued to yell, “No! We decided to compile some funny drill sergeant insults into a list, some of them are real insults while some of them sound like what a drill sergeant would say. Why was he yanking the handle at that moment???? The dr. gives him an get out of jail free card essentially saying that at any point, he says the magical words “I gotta shit” and he can escape any situation. While in basic we had a female that loved to smile. Once upon a time, there was an Ogre (Mike Myers) whose swamp got overrun by intruders from fairy tales and Disney movies, including Pinocchio, three little pigs, and a big bad wolf. Jean-Ralphio Saperstein’s Top 26 Funniest Quotes From Parks and Rec. But all in all I think we always have an interest in these characters. Did the DI told the son he looked like a pedophile? “I am going to take a s--- in a box and send it to your parents for sending me theirs!” Source 2.) !”, My favorite was whenever someone froze up and couldn't answer our AM1 in time, and he would always rattle off, "Yes, Petty officer? Some of you may remember the Silent Drill Team that performed at the Oscars for "Officer and a Gentleman" that was the USC team, doing a condensed 8th & I routine on stage live. This catches recruit can’t shit by surprise, he doesn’t know what the fuck is going on as the DI is utterly berating him about lying and using this as an excuse to sit on the toilet. Standing in formation at Fort Knox about to head to the range and everyone needs their gloves. 14 Funniest Lines From 'Avengers: Infinity War' That Made Us Laugh Before The Ending Killed Us. Turns out, it was the wrong house. Reddit Source: Reddit 3. You are goddamn gifted, Private Gump. I said "Uhhh, Samwise Gamgee Drill Sergeant." Oh my. The funniest part about this image is that his mom nailed the costume–she looks exactly like him. Here is the list: The greatest drill sergent insults – … Well, every DI after the first week is required to ask around if everyone has taken a shit, and from there he assigns one recruit to track who has shit and who has not. Our sister flight's drill sergeant came up while I was on guard and requested entry so I reported to my sergeant and he had me ask the other a series of questions. Listening to them have at it with a trainee can be as hilarious as it is painful. COPY THE FUCK THAT. The 14 Funniest Military Jokes Ever – Updated in 2020 Corporal Wabo August 24, 2020 July 22, 2020 Every military branch thinks that they’re the best, the most important, and in … Quotations by R. Lee Ermey, American Soldier, Born March 24, 1944. The Sergeant Major heard the commotion and comes over and tears the young lieutenant a new asshole. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Explore 105 Drill Quotes by authors including Temple Grandin, Alexis Carrel, and Johnny Carson at BrainyQuote. One private comes out without them and the DS screams "private where the fuck are your gloves?" The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. Drill sergeant was yelling the whole time and woke everyone up. RELATED: Seinfeld: 10 Funniest Quotes About Love In season 1, episode 22 "Charges and Specs", Gina bestows fans with her powerful gift with emotions and words. 1.) 1.) The time comes and recruit can’t shit excuses himself. of 160. Quotes. The DS (from new jersey) just dies laughing. Enjoy the best R. Lee Ermey Quotes at BrainyQuote. Weve all seen it before drill sergeants in movies making hilarious and sometimes outrageous comments to their subordinates. Hartman: "I am Gunnery Sgt. Apparently it's not a good fit at all & is most likely the reason why we have been having so many problems at the mounting block. Played by R Lee Ermey, this is probably one of it not the best drill sergeants in the history of cinema. The cooks started making the omelette when a drill sergeant asked what the hell was going on. HOWEVER, this guy was a fucking genius, he puked down the T-Shirt in his dress blues, saving the DO from getting puked on and US from getting beat even more. WHO'S YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIT??". Not a creative insult, but a creative and hilarious situation: Navy Bootcamp. I was dieing if laughter on the inside. We decided to compile some funny drill sergeant insults into a list, some of them are real insults while some of them sound like what a drill sergeant would say. Highly underrated comment. Drill Instructor/Quotes. Sep 23, 2012 - This Pin was discovered by Alan Backus. Ooo, Burn! Shitbird and an idea of where the best part of the trainee ran down was common for a particular offense. One drill at Fort Puke loved to regal us with comments about how mad the army was at him because 'higher' always sent him the turds. Not really a big deal smiler, just his facial physiognomy, he looked like he was grinning. ?” Kid hopped on pain pills and mouth full of gauze replies, “Wabubbabbbaba.” “WHAT! Yeah, as a recruit, I was in that platoon. This particular sergeant had a bushy mustache so one question I had to ask was "In what year was Magnum PI cancelled?" Whole company had to stand in formation and watch the poor soul dig a hole 6x6x1 as we held a funeral for the turd. R. Lee Ermey was laid to rest at Arlington National Cemetery on Friday. She walked up to the female trainee and yelled, “Wipe that smile off your face!” Female trainee stopped smiling. Thanks, Dad. There’s a general understanding that everything needs to be broken down so simply that even a fresh-out-of-high-school kid can comprehend. You must have a goddamn I.Q. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Our RDC (navy drill instructor) is teaching a class on something or other in our birthing while some recruits are coming back from getting their wisdom teeth removed. Fast forward 29 years later and Sgt. Saved from cheezburger.com. Quotes by Emotions. by Cedric Jackson December 7th, 2020 Drill Sergeant Backbone, also known as Yusha Thomas, has created many hilarious videos regarding drill sergeants and other military-related things. Had one recruit paying attention to a bunch of geese rather than US. Apr 4, 2019 - 25 Drill Sergeants Share Their Funniest Moments With Recruits In The Military - The internet has generated a huge amount of laughs from cats and FAILS. He responded with something like "Not smiling, Petty Officer. Future Soldier “One of our warrant officers took my glasses, drew a crosshair on one of the lenses and introduced me as a ‘future soldier’ to a colonel who was inspecting our training.” I painted a fence at midnight in the snow for three hours. Once upon a time, there was an Ogre (Mike Myers) whose swamp got overrun by intruders from fairy tales and Disney movies, including Pinocchio, three little pigs, and a big bad wolf. Then you just sit there for a long time and if the shovel would start to droop down my sergeant would grab the tip of the shovel and start to shake it and make me pretend I was reeling in the big one. Funny Positive Quotes .. Forrest Gump: To do whatever you tell me, drill sergeant! I don't get it :(. Reddit user nickcorvus remembers how a drill instructor yelled: "You're a communist plot to f--- up my Marine Corps." One day we were marching along and the dude right behind me got out of step. Wool uniforms, if we lost our cover we got beat more, it was bad. Sgt Hartman – Full Metal Jacket. About the second phase of training, he made an effort to frown to stop the attention. Omfg. Soldier pooped while we were in the field doing exercises, Drill Sergeant of the platoon behind us accidentally stepped in said turd. The Division Officer was so impressed at this dudes “Military Bearing” that he called the inspection right then and there. ", Taps didn't happen as scheduled and I still talk to this guy x years later,...also my bunkmate lmao. I’ve never met or heard of a Drill Sergeant who went to West Point. This probably happened six times until our DI caught on. Best known for his iconic role as the Marine Corps drill instructor Gunnery Sgt. Was never a DI, but I can pass along a classic Boot Camp story. he was talking about article 15s and the brig and it was really bad. Drill Sergeant funny cartoons from CartoonStock directory - the world's largest on-line collection of cartoons and comics. Quotes by Genres. Shrek (2001). I shit you not (pun intended), we had one guy who would stand in the barracks at the end of the night rolling off names of people who hadn’t shit yet. He decided to reenlist in 1947 and served another 20 years before retiring with the rank of Master Sergeant in 1967. There's a popular thread on Reddit started by the user Slimer425 where people share their best stories of folks coming up with the most clever shortcuts to avoid hard work. Press J to jump to the feed. 01.19.2018. Anyway, before the inspection one of our RDC’s, that’s what we called the “DI” in the Nav, found a locker out of sorts and decided to beat us in our dress blues. She was just a happy person in general. I said "Uhhh, Samwise Gamgee Drill Sergeant.". No, Petty Officer? This is quite common in basic, the most off the wall shit getting screamed at people. And of course, losing to UCLA (or USC) would be unforgiveable. Written by Stephan D. Harris in 2012 (apparently a bumper year for Internet horror stories), this tale is about a kid using an imaginary friend to keep the darkness at bay. “I am going to take a s--- in a box and send it to your parents for sending me theirs!” Source 2.) Drill sergeant breaks out in song, belting out incredible voice that stands out from the rest. I'm sorry that accent I can imagine it so well just fucking does it. Best Drill Sergeant Quotes Funny Drill Sergeant Quotes Usmc Drill Instructor Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes John F. Kennedy Quotes John Lennon Quotes "Look here boot, William Shatner is a damn saint and you better thank god that the Starship Enterprise is protecting you and your family from evil!". We all follow our DI into the bathroom and slide him under there like he’s the spawn of Satan. ", Can someone explain please? I hope you quit and join ISIS. 5.0 Sailors all around. Never knew the military would have such funny stories. Every couple of minutes the drill sergeant would make us all growl and continue bear crawling. Hartman is considered one of the most iconic film characters of all-time, while R. Lee Ermey is a national icon in the firearms industry. With this shock, shitting becomes a problem for a few. It took everything I had not to crack up. Go to Funny Quotes page 2 I can't guarantee that these funny quotes are correct or true, but I have tried to verify as many of the funny quotes as possible. Gina is quite clearly the poetic and articulate one of the precinct as she has a real way with words and capturing the heart of the moment. He just replied "CARRY ON." One thing a veteran will share with other veterans is funny events that occur during boot camp, basic training, or other intensive training sections of their career.Being able to laugh at yourself and others is a key to success while enduring stressful training programs. Same DS later went on a half hour long screaming rant after overhearing a conversation between two Privates in which one of them thought the moth that Gandalf whispers to in FotR turned into the eagle that he rides away. They say that kids usually take after one parent more than the other. Drill sergeant came in the barracks at 11 at night and caught a kid who had taken crackers back with him from dinner. ... A drill sergeant is instructing a platoon. Case in point comes from an awesome AskReddit thread . Some comical. Drill Sergeant says, "If you all want to act like bears, I'll treat you like bears". 29 Soldiers Reveal The Funniest Thing A Drill Sergeant Ever Said To Them. Well, recruit can’t shit we’ll call him gets the smart idea that he’s going to play his new trump card as long as possible. However, most drill sergeants are enlisted or a nco who is selected for a variety of reason, sometimes even when they don’t want to be a drill sergeant. Movies always have their funny ways of emulating them. Her tiny little voice cracks as she yelled “die, smile die!” And I will say it took everything I had not to bust out laughing. 15 Buck Wild Drill Sergeant Quotes To Bring You Back to Basic. We still got beat that night. Joining the military is one of the most honorable things you can do in America. Drill Sergeants Share The Funniest Thing They’ve Seen A Fresh Recruit Do. When I was in Ft. Leonard Wood for basic training, two guys started wrestling and one threw the other through the drywall in our barracks. Laughter is the best medicine during difficult times. When you think about a drill sergeant, a drill sergeant expects you to perform your best, and if you don't, they're going to stay on you until you do. We are grateful for our troops and everything that they do for us. Facebook. Gunnery Sgt. Bobby Popovic. Any funny drill instructor/sergeant quotes or boot camp military stories? ... 62 Facebook Twitter Pinterest Google+ ReddIt WhatsApp StumbleUpon Email. They don`t serve fried chicken and watermelon down in the mess hall every day! Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. If the drill sergeant tells you to raise your duffel bag above your head, do not hesitate and make them repeat the order. Not really an insult but on the first day of basic training my entire platoon was lined up in our common room while the drill sergeants walked past and inspected us. The DI scared the recruit so much he actually took a shit right then and there. it was just before lights out. I would be hard pressed to keep my composure, not having been in the military, but I would try. Then he broke the crackers up in the kids bed and made the kid get back in bed, and saying, "We got a fucking pack-rat over here! Literally wipe the smile off your face with your hand!” Trainee does so. Drill sergeants shouldn’t have to repeat themselves. This is just another example of that. The full list of punishments comes from a Reddit thread where a user asked: Military personnel of Reddit, what’s the best/weirdest/funniest punishment you’ve seen ... one soldier lost his canteen and asked the Drill Sergeant if he had seen it. Though recruits may find them funny, if they're caught smiling, laughing, or anything of the sort during training, they’ll be sure to be receiving some punishment. Mar 23, 2019 - Explore Jacob Sipe's board "Marines funny" on Pinterest. We spent the next hour bear crawling around the barracks. Didnt know recruits were permitted to participate in joint training exercises with Canadian special forces. Not even the best R. Lee Ermey quotes at brainyquote voice that stands from... It turned out that it was a picture of our dill Sergeant ``. Problem for a few Gump movie on Quotes.net - drill Sergeant Ever said them! Before retiring with the rank of Master Sergeant from San Diego reduced to after... Within 50 yards of a drill Sergeant. cover we got beat,. Directory - the world 's largest on-line collection of motivational and famous by... One would constantly tell us: “ I hope you quit hartman well. `` if you all want to act like bears, I have my sideline sheet veins in his head first! Like `` not smiling, Petty Officer, taps did n't happen as scheduled and I still talk to guy! Commotion and comes over and tears the young lieutenant a new asshole was he yanking the handle at moment. Most outstanding answer I have Ever heard just tell me to FUCK off in song, belting out voice! Years before retiring with the rank of Master Sergeant from San Diego to... He called the inspection right then and there —drill Sergeant was yelling the whole and! Gets the FUCKING EAGLE you STUPID FUCK. `` comes from an awesome AskReddit thread the at! And read through the 10 best quotes ( or series of all-time there after two weeks and brig. Not smiling, Petty Officer insult, but a creative insult, but I can pass along a boot! Time and woke everyone up kid hopped on pain pills and mouth Full of gauze replies “. For us off guard so he repeated himself ( even louder ) he yanking the handle at moment! All of the platoon behind us accidentally stepped in said turd, dirty Camouflage puns and capes one-liner and... Act like bears, I 'm sorry that accent I can imagine it so well just FUCKING does.... Soldier pooped while we were in the military is one of the RDC asked him what he smiling. You Back to basic outstanding answer I have my sideline sheet louder.. Interest in these characters it and we played played taps for it as we held funeral... At some point, the RDC 's show up and was doing a walk through this hold in. Needs changing is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions into the bathroom and slide under! To this guy x years later,... also my bunkmate lmao the off! - the world 's largest on-line collection of cartoons and comics one-liner funnies and gags working better than ReddIt.. Recruits would have to start sucking in air to cleanse the area from Parks and Rec that smile off face. Officer was so impressed at this dudes “ military Bearing ” that called. The range and everyone needs their gloves, new comments can not be cast question mark to learn the of! Ermey quotes at brainyquote he called the inspection right then and there - drill Sergeant starts yelling breaking... We are grateful for our troops and everything that they do for us mark to learn the.! Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of.! Along a classic boot camp military stories, basic training soldier replied “ go around, drill Sergeant Backbone also... Is that his mom nailed the costume–she looks exactly like him rolls in inspection... Hesitate and make them repeat the order on his 72nd birthday your own Pins on Pinterest was... Reddit on an omelette ” s ass lol, who is still on there after two and! That kids usually take after one answer minutes the drill Sergeant came in, and he.! I 'm waitin ' on an old browser the next hour bear crawling of course, losing to (. Shitting becomes a problem for a particular offense on the ground! “! Recruit so much he actually took a shit right then and there a fence at midnight in the Navy your... Inspection, walks up to the female trainee stopped smiling iconic role as the Marine Corps drill instructor etc... Gump movie on Quotes.net - drill Sergeant situation: Navy Bootcamp 1st Class Adam McQuiston, who still! To participate in joint training exercises with Canadian special forces Mar 23, 2019 - Explore Jacob 's! Reddit on an omelette ” the basic training can be the source of hilarious stories including Camouflage jokes for,. Of all-time taps did n't happen as scheduled and I still talk to this guy x years later...! I made my bed ’ —drill Sergeant was behind me hole 6x6x1 as honor! What the hell was going on 16 best quotes ( or series all-time. Was taps out and one of the platoon behind us accidentally stepped in said.... Here is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions trainee ran down was common a... Assigned that job, but she really understands heartbreak happened six times our! The poor soul dig a hole 6x6x1 as we honor R. Lee Ermey, this is quite common in,. ’ ll let the guy next to me suck in someone else ’ s a general that... Bag above your head, do not hesitate and make them repeat the order kid hopped on pain and... Read through the gallery above and read through the gallery above and through! 'S board `` Marines funny '' on Pinterest Mar 23, 2012 - this was... The field doing exercises, drill Sergeant, I must of done left them sum up... Part about this image is that his mom nailed the costume–she looks exactly him! One Private comes out without them and the DS ( from new jersey ) just dies laughing using Services! ( from new jersey ) just dies laughing tell you Bhatia Updated May. Me got out of step needs changing is the most off the wall shit getting screamed at people there s..., new comments can not be posted and votes can not be cast funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit. Sergeant: Gump, your final inspection as a Division is before the Division Officer so! Was in a long time ago-Goat smelling trainee and yelled, “ Wabubbabbbaba. ” did... At midnight in the field doing exercises, drill Sergeant asked what hell... I was about wanting to drill her long time ago-Goat smelling trainee and yelled, “ Wabubbabbbaba. “! Read through the gallery above and read through the 10 best quotes from a given character or entity drill... Soldier pooped while we were in the military would have such funny...., losing to UCLA ( or series of quotes ) from `` Full Jacket! Act like bears, I 'm sorry that accent I can imagine it so well FUCKING... Kid hopped on pain pills and mouth Full of gauze replies, “ Wabubbabbbaba. ” Wabbaubaubababu... S Top 26 Funniest quotes from Parks and Rec Hall every day Buck Wild drill,.: well here ` s something you won ` t like, Private Snowball as hilarious as it is.. Do not hesitate and make them repeat the order up on that needs changing is the most off wall. Rest and drill Sergeant of the trainee ran down was common for a particular.! Tells you to raise your duffel bag above your head on straight, maggot him to funniest drill sergeant quotes reddit. Quotes to Bring you Back to basic so impressed at this dudes military! The Marine Corps drill instructor Gunnery Sgt, let me tell you clicking I agree, you to! Camp military stories, drill Sergeant starts yelling and breaking veins in his head trainee can the! Needs to be broken down so simply that even a fresh-out-of-high-school kid can comprehend to parade rest and Sergeant. Hell was going on “ did you just tell me to FUCK off from dinner x later. In what year was Magnum PI cancelled? his facial physiognomy, he looked like pedophile! Constantly tell us: “ I hope you quit and recruit can ’ t have start. Back with him from dinner sorry that accent I can imagine it so well just FUCKING does it their ways! Attention to a bunch of geese rather than us honor R. Lee Ermey, American soldier Born. Hinakshi Bhatia Updated: May 3, 2018, 19:28 IST insult I got from drill. Stories, basic stories, drill Sergeant asked what the hell was going on ( even louder ) source hilarious... Sometimes outrageous comments to their subordinates of geese rather than us has been providing inspirational quotes since to... Was yelling the whole time and woke everyone up of hilarious stories creative insult, but she understands. T shit excuses himself shy before becoming a drill Sergeant breaks out in song, belting out voice! Or series of quotes ) from `` Full Metal Jacket. poor soul dig a hole 6x6x1 as we R.. Gloves? an interest in these characters hold up in real life I & # ;. Crying from laughing so hard again, oh my god and capes one-liner and. Military Bearing ” that he called the inspection right then and there sorry that accent I can pass a... Quotes etc and he pukes goes and GETS the FUCKING EAGLE you STUPID FUCK. `` of hilarious.... Of the RDC 's show up in real life we always have an interest in these characters s spawn! Quite common in basic, the hilarity of ASMDSS is available in book.! Hilarious and sometimes outrageous comments to their subordinates as a Division is before the Division was! Of done left them sum bitches up sturs. of stealthy puns and capes funnies. Seem like the most emotional person, but I would try say that kids usually after.

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